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Hello Loqers’ Everywhere!
The summer breeze is light and pure and the hail of both water from the sky and lead from muskets has slowed enough to allow some rumination on subjects of some freedom of choice. With this in mind and with a refreshing beverage in hand I turn to one of the most fondly regarded races in all of Valon; the Todoroni of Nepolise. It has often been that throughout the history of Flintloque players have wanted to dive a little deeper into the realm of the mottle skinned slimy ones. So with a hop, skip and croak I dive into the lilly pond! I have taken the liberty of collating some of the more frequent questions about the Todoroni into this column to give all of you some of the answers you have so often sought from me. I apologise in advance to those of you who have already been in receipt of some of this information; but read on and feel not faint of heart for there are treats a plenty that warrant a continuation of your attention! Nepolise is a land full of the unknown. Its landscape is amongst the most beautiful to be found in all of old Urop, certainly more lovely than the soot stained stacks of Albion, and its inhabitants some of the strangest. The Todoroni are unlike any other race on Valon as their ancestors were the now vanquished Toadec. Slaves of the Lizardmen of the Darke Age the Toadec learned to live in the constant sun and heat of what would become Nepolise and to cope with the steaming pools that their masters lounged in when not at war. As slaves the ancestors of the Todoroni had obedience both beaten and bred into them. The few rebellions that occurred were crushed without mercy and as a result those Toadec that survived simply lost the ability to be aggressive and to handle the arms of war with any skill. With the arrival of the Dracci, the children of the Dragons, in the lands of the Lizardmen the Toadec had even more to fear. The blood red reptilian Dracci had little love for the Lizardmen but used them as willing allies. However, often they would actually slaughter and consume a Toadec that did not evade them quickly enough. Through the rest of the Dark Age the wars continued and the bleakness of existence weighed heavily upon all those who would one day be Todoroni. With the end of Wylde Magicke and the demise of the Lizardmen and their masters the terrifying Dracci the Todoroni took on a lifestyle of art, culture, food and love (not just your own wife but anyone's you think you can get away with!). For a while this was ideal. Cities sprang up containing statuesque buildings of marble and alabaster, markets filled with trade and song. While the Todoroni did not achieve a nation as such each city lived pretty much at peace with the next with the only squabbles being over lovely lady toads who had strayed too far...if you follow my meaning. Then, from neighbouring Armorica came fire and thunder. Nepolise had the unfortunate geographical problem of being next door to Armorica. It also had the problem of being on its own in the world for while other nations had banded into alliances Nepolise was little more than a number of loose city states. The blue coated columns of the tyrant Emperor Mordred had little trouble entering and conquering all of Nepolise. There was resistance to this conquest to be sure; the northern city states fought with valiant courage but they were beaten with ease. In the south surrender was organised before the first Elf was spotted and none fawned more at the feet of the tyrant than those of Nappoly and the island Pondlerno. As a reward these Todoroni were given not only official status as soldiers of the Ferach Empire but also made local master of the whole of Nepolise. This sparked several civil wars among the northern and southern cities but the Elves were happy to let this go along as it served as training for the warty ones. It would be true to say that in battle the Todoroni were nothing short of awful in those early days under the Empire. Even the Big Todoroni (Todoroni come in two species ‘Big’ and ‘Little’ with the little ones being about Elf sized and the big ones nearly as tall as Ogres) were better at catching bullets than firing them at the enemy. The Todoroni had little notion of war, and fighting each other taught them almost nothing, it was just not in their history to be aggressive. During the initial campaigns against Ostaria and then the Nepolise who hopped on into Diberia these shortcomings were painfully exposed. Casualties were very heavy and eventually the Emperor relegated the Toads to baggage train and garrison duties; even more so when the Dwarves of Finklestein and the Dutchy of Coltz joined the Empire and made their troops his. As a joke the wine and women chasing Todoroni just tried to keep their heads down and get on with it. Eventually Mordred was forced to recruit from the more rebellious northern cities such as Melano, Venis and Glencroka as he prepared the half million soldiers to form the Grande Armee du Norde. These northern Toads looked no different than those of the south but they were mentally made of sterner stuff and made the role of cavalry, gunners and skirmishers their own. Almost all of the Todoroni who survived the Aegyptian campaign against the Othari and the retreat from Moskova were of northern Nepolise. Little is known of the Todoroni in Aegypt who went there with Mordred to battle the Sultan. Few of them returned and while this is nothing unusual for the Aegyptian campaign for the Ferach Empire it was not due to scimitars and jezails that most of the Todoroni succumbed. Almost all of the Todoroni ended up in Kairoh guarding precious stores, this suited them. But the weather turned many of the Toads into shrivelled bags of crunchy skin as the Nepolise, it transpired, need a lot of water to stay healthy. The other cause of many Toad ends was not death but desertion. As natural entertainers the Otharmann Empire took to them in a big way, singing, dancing, flower arranging and more. A better life than being shot at… so they left and are still filling halls to this day all over the lands of the Othari. At the moment the country of Nepolise is quiet and tranquil and the Mordredian Wars are far away. While the northern cities still harbour a desire from freedom from the Ferach Empire they are hedging their bets that Greate Britorcn will hammer the Elves for them. In the south the Elves are welcomed with open arms and several have taken high office in Nappoly and Pondlerno. Money and culture from all over the Empire are pouring into the south. How long this happy bliss will last is the guess of anyone, but you can be fairly sure that the shock that sparks a new conflict between the north and the south will come from far outside of Nepolise. However do not confuse the peace of state in Nepolise with an absence of violence and adventure, oh no. Hundreds of Todoroni every season are sent to their maker by the Naffia, the crime families of Nepolise, who control everything from gun running to smuggling and protection rackets even up to providing troops and monies to kit out some northern regiments for the war! You can often find running skirmishes between Naffia and Ferach loyal guards, some Naffia even fight nominally for King Gorge of Albion, or at least for his shillings. Recently a solid silver statue of Generalie Ferro Rospo was stolen right from under the nose of the womaniser and his wife in Nappoly! Some Valonian nations have folk heroes and legends to sustain them in times of strife but not the Todoroni. Their legends are of oppression and fire, times of their former masters their own draconian overlords. The Nepolise sing and dance and look to the future always for to look backwards is too terrifying, too bleak. Instead they idolise their new heroes, those Toads who have gone out into the world and made a name for the whole country, putting aside city loyalties. Toads like General Ferro Rospo, commander of Nepolise forces in the Witchlands the Lucca the Newt a commander with naffia connections. In addition to these two notable commanders is the Baron Petrochemicoli a wealthy and urbane character who walks the highest echelons of Nepolise and indeed Armorican society. He dresses in the finest of clothes and financed the raising of the first private Todoroni guard regiment of infantry; the Cotechino Guarda. Keep an eye on this fellow as his tunic buttons up tight over many duties. But not all that the Todoroni have achieved since the end of the Darke Age is in the game world... Over the last fifteen years the Todoroni of Nepolise miniature range has come a long way. From an origin as a little joke, chocolate box soldiers, scared and running when someone yelled boo at them. Having only two packs of miniatures the love of many Flintloque and Slaughterloo players demanded that Nepolise was ‘raised from the ranks’ and given proper place as the main ally of the Armorican Elves in their war against the Grand Alliance. Since this decision was taken many Todoroni miniatures have been released; beginning with the perennial favourite 56505 Bella Lugosi militia infantry. Expanding on came the Leonardo Fuchelli and the Crustati Splendido, both line infantry, one for sunny Catalucia and the other the frozen climes of the Witchlands. Then came the awesome cavalry of the Cacciatore Natterjacki Di Molto Splendido, hussar Todoroni in elaborate uniforms riding baby hippopotamus. To then give players of Slaughterloo a full Todoroni division to take to the field Alternative Armies released two mounted commanders in the LE038 Ferra Rospo set and 56111 Lucca the Newt followed by 56529 Todoroni Artillery Crew. Lastly the 56538 Nepolise Light Company. Nepolise was now a full nation in miniature! Taking the army of Nepolise into the very near history of Alternative Armies we have detailed their forces in complete terms in two of the new Flintloque 3rd edition book; 5025 War in Catalucia and 5027 Grapeshotte. The release of the elite 56540 Cotechino Garda at the time of Salute 2010 in London finally give the Todoroni their version of the Orcish ‘105th Rifles’ or the Elvish ‘Velite Grenadiers de la Garde’; rock hard troops to give any enemy what for! Now in the present of July 2010 we are readying another further release into the lands of the slimy ones and its my pleasure to give this scoop to Orcs in the Webbe. The next Todoroni pack is LE043 Baron Petrochemicoli. The baron is the officer in chief and financier of the Cotechino Garda and is one cool character indeed. Petrochemicoli is a personality commander with his own unique rules and conditions (which are detailed with the miniatures). Being a limited edition each pack is one of a number one thousand. The pack will be released on 30th June 2010. Here is a sneak preview of LE043. 
 
Lastly I would like to offer some ideas for scenarios using the Todoroni of Nepolise; call them ‘scenario seeds’ if you will. With all of the new and more recent miniatures available a lot of fun can be had. For example you could: · Take some Bella Lugosi militia and have them face off against savage Elves wielding only swords and axes. Raiding parties from Tuscani often make it into Nepolise. This can be done with the Flintloque Lite free rules. · Use Flintloque 3rd edition to make up a section of Naffia guerrillas and attempt to steal the silver statue of General Ferro Rospo right from under his nose. The general would have about ten in his personal guard but the Naffia would have surprise on their side. · With a copy of Grapeshotte 3rd edition you can field the Cotechino Garda as ‘guard infantry’ and have them assault a stronghold held by northern Todoroni rebels. These rebels might well be a dozen or so ‘Big’ Toads armed with Bessie muskets and determined to declare the freedom of Melano from Elvish oppression. So until the next column, keep playing, keep having fun and make sure your Flints are sharp and your Loques greased! Gavin Syme. |
